Down and Out

feeling down and out.
Wishing I could get up
Not knowing how.
Not knowing when.
I gotta get out.
This whole is encasing me
Taking all that I am
All that I could be.
Swallowing me whole
Never wanting to let go.
But not knowing how to get out
Getting comfertable in this whole
Trying to make it my own
Giving up on getting out
Giving up on myself.
Feeling down and out
This whole has swallowed me whole
Taking all of me
All that i could be

Clouds..

As I look upon the sky
the perywinkle colored clouds are breath taking
It looks as if they float across the sky effortlessly
They swim in a sea of blue serinity
All looks so calm at the surface
No one ever really gets close enough to see how everything really is
We all look from the surface
Everything looks so calm
Half of us actually wish to be one

But No one see's the winds that push them along rapidly
The stroms the brew in the distance
No one knows that on the other side there is black
Where all isnt so peaceful
Where blue serinity is curupt.

Who really knows anyone?--just some random thoughts..

As these words float across the screen, its almost surreal.
My feelings easily appear. They come out so smooth.
But when I try to speak them, they never flow. Afraid
of what might come out. How much I might reveal.

These words just come out. Come out when Im all alone.
When there is no one but me to hear what I have to say.
Because I cant judge myself, when I already know everything
about myself. When know one is around the real me comes out.

Know one knows the real me, but me. People I have known all
my life, dont really know me. Who really knows anyone? There
is always something, that someone hides from someone. But you
can neverhide from yourself. You can try, but thats a battle you
will never win.

And he's still a stranger...

I feel the fire in his heart each time our eyes meet.
In every smile I feel his kindness rush over me.

And yet he's still a stranger...

I see him almost everyday.
Im greeted with a smile and smooth words
But never long enough
to get a glimpse of what lies within.

So he's still a stranger...

I think of him everyday.
As I rise from my bed
and glance out the window,
just to get one glimpse.
Every evening I sit waiting and anticipating.

But he's still a stranger...

We've exchanged names
We've spoke a few times.
But never long enough to get
a glimpse of what lies within.

And He's still a stranger..

Happy and Free..

As the birds fly freely ahead,
I dream..
I dream of the day when I am free of all my worries.
My chains and shackles will be broken.
There would lay no doubt apon my head.

As the birds whistle there joyful song,
I listen..
I listen with pain and jealousy.
I too play a song,
but my song is full of sorrow, and shame.

They fly with such bounce and happiness.
How is it they are so happy, and free.
I wish that one day I could be like a bird.
Happy and Free..

My dear sweet man...

My dear sweet man.
He is so gental to the touch
And sweet to the taste.

But Im so sour to him

He dosent deserve my sourness.
He is so faithful to me.

But there are many secrets I hide.
Secrets Im afraid might make him hide.

Once he gave me a chance.
A chance to tell all that is within.
But I stayed quite
And kept my secrets silent.

Afraid of losing, my dear sweet man.

Dedicated to: my dear sweet D.W. (you know who you are)